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#1: Don’t be a Wet Blanket.
Do things that scare you.
Do those things you have been putting off for ages.
Do hard things.
Do the things you feel resistant to do.
Wake-up early.
Hit the road and run.
Lift weights.
Sit down to hear and feel your thoughts.
Engage in tough conversations.
Fast for 48 hours.
Smash ice-baths.
Crank up the sauna.
Comfort creeps into your life the older and more established you get.
The grind should not stop, because the grind keeps you young and fresh.
Being uncomfortable is a necessity for growing mentally, physically and spiritually.
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#2: Do Things You Deserve.
You want the reward, you need to sacrifice.
You want the beach body, you need discipline.
You want the lifestyle, you need to put in the daily grind.
Think about it like this:
- That chocolate bar you want to eat. Have you done your 5km run to deserve it?
- That mental clarity you desire. Have you sat down to journal for the day to deserve it?
- That great marriage you want back. Have you had the difficult conversations to deserve it?
- That success you crave. Have you put in the hours of dedication and hard work to deserve it?
You deserve the life you have based on the effort, dedication, sacrifice and grind you have put in.
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#3: Don’t Be Afraid to Reinvent Yourself.
People are way too concerned and afraid of what other people think.
People are too comfortable with the lives they have.
People don’t believe in their own abilities enough.
You are not on this planet to live a one-dimensional life by staying in the same lifelong career.
You are here to explore and evolve who you are and what you want to become.
Keep thinking ahead of when you’re 80 years old and looking back on your life…
Did you give it a proper crack?
Did you live to your full potential?
Did you have fun?
Did you live a life of growth and adventure?
Did you let fear get the better of you?
Did you take the risks you could have?
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#4: Momentum is Messy.
No progression in life is linear. Far from it.
In life, the setbacks are there to rein you in a little. To take a pitstop.
To learn some lessons, before you create enough tension for the next parabolic move.
With all those different projects you are working on, all those balls juggling in the air…
The frustration you feel is part of the process.
It’s there to separate the wheat from the chaff.
The slow progress, the messiness, is all part of the build phase.
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#5: Judgement is for Cowards.
Any time spent judging others (especially without the full story) is detracting from yourself.
You are wasting your time talking about other people’s lives, decisions, actions…..when you could spend that time improving yourself.
Remove yourself from gossip circles.
By engaging in judgement you are preventing yourself from attaining your own higher powers.
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#6: Everyone is Living a Different Reality.
Our past, shapes our present. The way you grew up, determines how you experience the world.
In times of conflict or disagreement, consider the other person’s reality.
They are acting that way because it is ‘normal’ for them.
It’s up to you to be the bigger person and manage the situation.
Asking questions, is your best way to find understanding in other people’s worldviews.
Putting your ego aside is a superpower in this scenario, but also one of the most difficult things to do.
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#7: Show People How You Like to be Treated.
You can be strong, at the same time as being kind and considerate with how you treat and speak to people.
Speaking up for yourself and your needs is essential. Nobody else understands what you want, besides you.
This is why boundaries are a necessity.
Allowing people to ignore your boundaries, gives permission to be walked all over.
By them taking advantage, you are informing them what is acceptable.
You need to set your boundaries and enforce them respectfully.
Being silent when people show up late —> you’re teaching them it’s okay to disrespect your time.
Being silent about energy sucking people —> you’re teaching them it’s okay to steal your positive vibes.
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#8: If You’re Not Part of the Steamroller, You’re Part of the Road.
Take action. Do the things you say you will do.
That person who is half as gifted and talented as you, is smashing it because they are taking action.
You owe it to yourself to show up every day and do ‘the thing’.
Taking action makes you feel good and purposeful.
Plan. Be organised. Go away on micro-adventures. Do things as a family.
Operating in an uplifting environment is what you want to be part of.
Be unstoppable.
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#9: Guard your Time Ferociously.
The amount of Zombies walking around is scary.
Walking, while looking down and staring at their phone.
Eating dinner, while reading the news on their phone.
Training in the gym, while scrolling away.
Your time is so precious.
Everybody is distracted. Some, much worse than others.
When you die having spent 50% of your life looking at a screen, and only 10% engaged in real life, it’s all going to be too late.
Disconnect from the digital world to avoid feeling empty and isolated.
Create time and space for what matters.
Be disciplined with your phone usage.
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#10: Avoid Emotional Embroilment.
The way you respond in any situation determines the next steps.
Highly emotional reactions are a sign that you have not thought through the situation and do not understand your own feelings deeply enough.
Avoid emotional responses by asking a question: “What does that mean?” or “Why do you say that?”
Sometimes the best response is taking a ‘time-out’ to help defuse the situation and find clarity before responding.
These are high level stakes, so your emotional maturity needs to reflect that.
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#11: Have No Expectations.
The quickest path to disappointment is expecting someone to behave a certain way.
Most conflicts occur due to misaligned expectations.
It’s easy to feel upset by expecting someone to act the way you want them to.
So take full responsibility of your mindset in all situations before there are any ‘unfavourable’ outcomes.
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#12: Be Intentional.
Think about how you want to show up.
A little pep-talk with yourself before you walk into the ‘arena’ is extremely valuable. Do not take this lightly.
Your energy speaks before you do.
Remember that people in a room will naturally gravitate to the highest energy.
So, decide if you are the person hunched over, looking uncertain, and avoiding all eye contact.
Or…
The person walking in with a smile, shoulders back and chest puffed out…
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#13: Protect your Emotions at all Costs.
Emotional control is your sovereignty.
Humans are emotional beings. It’s what makes us the loving creatures we are.
However, you need to be strong and steadfast with your emotional supremacy.
Do not allow your emotions to be dictated by other people’s decisions and feelings.
Do not fall into the trap of being a slave to your emotions.
No good decisions are ever made when you are emotionally unstable.
Amidst the chaos, you need to be a leader by providing clarity and rock solid strength.
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#14: Don’t be Afraid to Hold Contrarian Views.
We have become so conditioned to be quiet in fear of the mob cancelling us.
If your argument is concise and well researched then by all means express your thoughts.
The large majority of people have not thought through their understanding of the world. It’s pure regurgitation.
The world finds an equilibrium through dissenting worldviews. Engage in healthy debates.
The Socratic Method of Dialectics states – “When two people have a conversation a third thing gets known”
You never know what you might learn from others who have opposing views.
Be mature in conversations with others who have contrarian ideas and don’t let your opinions and emotions get the better of you.
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#15: Lead Through Action.
There is an incorrect approach to leadership whereby it’s done through force and control.
Rather, lead by showing the way. People are sponges.
We copy both good and bad behaviour. Over-lead in goodness!
Empower, inspire, and offer autonomy.
Sometimes the greatest leadership comes from relinquishing control.
Allow people to fail and learn lessons for themselves.
Cultivate environments where people have the flexibility to grow, and want to be a part of.
Encourage and promote abundance.
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#16: Have Alone Time.
Even the most extroverted people require time for introversion. It’s how we re-charge.
Thinking time is crucial for reflection.
Not only that, we need time apart in our relationships to avoid getting on each other’s nerves.
Women need time in their wells. Men need time in their caves.
Wake-up early. Minimise distractions. Write down your thoughts.
Reflect on life. Calm your nervous system.
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#17: Strive for Something Unrealistic.
You Are Not Average.
You were not put on this planet to be a watered down version of yourself.
Comfort leads to complacency.
Do not seek balance in your life.
Find harmony in how you spend your time and energy.
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#18: What You Pay Attention to Expands.
I read this recently and we can apply it to pretty much everything in our lives that we give attention to:
“Don’t constantly point out when the child is behaving badly, the man advised.
Instead, try to acknowledge when the child is behaving well. Because what you pay attention to-expands”
